Yesterday and Today

(are tangled together)

When I was 6 years old I walked home with a friend of mine on the last day of first grade. It had been raining and we were walking in the street toward her house looking at the water in the street gutters. There were some ants struggling with that stream. In my 6 year old mind I felt compassion for them and thought that if I could just turn into an ant for a little bit I could tell them they could build a bridge to get across. Funny how a kid can get so concerned for measly ants.

I didn't really get the connection with life until years later when I was grown up....but that incident stayed with me.

Bad as things get it's comforting to remember that there is actually a God who loves us and is just waiting for us to remember - when we are going through tough stuff - He's there. It just takes remembering - with childlike trust.

Why is something so simple sometimes so hard? Probably because we like to be in charge. Things that are painful - that we have NO control over - teach us something. Sometimes it's disciplinary. Spankings are nothing compared to junk we can get thrown at us from life. Nothing. In fact - if anything - it somehow puts the spankings in perspective. Once one stops - it's over. Then back to living - a little wiser.

I'd trade the last few months for a black and blue beating - any day - but it's not going to happen. I need to ride this boat where ever it's going so I'd better have faith in the captain. There's certainly proof of what He can do - everywhere.

I saw a movie when I was a kid - based on the era when Christians were fed to the lions in the colosseum. The emperor was walking around the resulting carnage from one of his live entertainment specials and he was exclaiming that the dead Christians had smiles on their faces! This was a secular movie that gave a kid like me something to think about for years to come! God moves in mysterious ways.

Can't help it though. Losing our Heather to cancer .... I just find it hard to get a grip, sometimes. Dear precious Heather... How I love you! I hope the ultimate result will be my getting stronger because right now I feel weak and vulnerable. But..... no one is naive enough to say the road is easy.

The road is only the road......not the destination.